Motherhood & Sensuality with Regan Figg
Motherhood and sensuality. In today's very patriarchal society, many people are made to feel like the two don't go together. There is this steeped view that mothers cannot be sensual or sexual beings. Many parents, especially mothers, have reached out to me and shared about their struggle with finding space for sensuality, so I brought in a guest expert that can speak on my favourite topic through the lens of motherhood.
Regan Figg is a Pleasurepreneur and Feminine Embodiment Coach. She helps women deepen their connection with their bodies, know, live & succeed from their feminine essence and lead with pleasure - in business, in motherhood, in relationship. Through the pathway and practices of sensuality, Tao Tantric arts, NLP, embodiment, and yogic practices, Regan mentors women through her uniquely curated Pleasurepreneur Mastermind, online programs, and private 1:1 coaching packages. Regan is here to be her embodied, liberated, sovereign Goddess self and inspire others to be the same.
In our chat today, we explored how new mothers can tap back into sensuality with ease. The problem with the Madonna-whore dichotomy, finding time for pleasure practices, how to be more present with yourself and your children, and setting an example of an embodiment for your children. Today's episode is for all the parents out there, anyone aspiring to be a parent or just helpful for anybody who knows people who have kids; we love a little bit of empathy around here.
In this episode, you'll learn
The Influence the Madonna-whore complex has had on Mothers as sexual beings
Reconnecting and fostering a relationship with your body and senses post-pregnancy
Common belief systems that block mothers from accessing pleasure and the process of reframing these beliefs
Following your pleasure and the positive impacts that can have on your children
Tapping into your senses and learning to be present with your children
This podcast is for YOU, so if you ever have any questions you’d like me to answer on the show, or topics you’d like me to cover – reach out to me on email here or over on instagram @eleanorhadley
Links & Resources
To work with me 1:1 head here
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Tune into the “Dive In with Regan Figg” podcast
Learn from & connect with Regan via her Instagram & Facebook pages;
The Sensuality Academy Podcast is edited and produced with thanks to Lucy Arellano. You can find her work at @lucy_podcastva
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Episode Transcript
Hello and welcome to The Sensuality Academy Podcast! Today’s episode is for all the parents out there, or anyone aspiring to be a parent someday. Hell, it’s even going to be worthwhile for you to understand more about the people in your lives who have kids. We love a bit of empathy around here!
I have a lot of parents in my audience, especially mothers - and I know many of you have reached out in the past and shared about your struggles with finding space for sensuality in motherhood. Now, I will never pretend to be the all knowing expert on every single facet of sensuality and I think it’s really important to outsource your weaknesses and to call in people who know more on certain topics. That’s why I love getting a wide variety of guests here on the show for you.
So today, we have a mumma joining us. Many of you, if you’re regular listeners or follow along with me on socials, will know that I’m most certainly not the person to be talking at all about motherhood. I’ve never had a desire to be a mother, it’s just not something that interests me or that feels aligned for me. But, I know that SO many of you do desire to be mothers, or parents, and many of you are. So, I wanted to bring someone on the show that can speak on my favourite topic of all - sensuality, of course - through the lens of motherhood.
It’s a pleasure to introduce my guest today, Regan Figg, a Pleasurepreneur and Feminine Embodiment Coach, who helps women to deepen their connection with their bodies, know, live & succeed from their feminine essence and lead with pleasure - in business, in motherhood, and in relationship.
Through the pathway and practices of sensuality, Tao Tantric arts, NLP, embodiment and yogic practices, Regan mentors women through her uniquely curated Pleasurepreneur Mastermind, online programs, and private 1:1 coaching packages. Regan is here to be her embodied, liberated, sovereign Goddess self and inspire others to be the same. She also has her own podcast “Dive In with Regan Figg”.
In my chat with Regan. we explored how new mothers can tap back into sensuality with ease, the problem with the madonna/whore dichotomy, finding time for pleasure practices, how to be more present with yourself and your children, setting an example of embodiment for your children and so much more.
I hope you love this episode and that if you’re a parent, that this helps you feel a bit more connected to your sensual self. Enjoy!
ELEANOR: Hello Regan and thank you so much for joining us on The Sensuality Academy Podcast. It’s a pleasure to have you here.
REGAN: It’s my pleasure to be here. I am deeply honoured. Thanks for having me.
ELEANOR: It’s an absolute pleasure. Today we are talking about Motherhood and Sensuality. This is something for a lot of people who believe that the two don’t go well together. In our very patriarchal society often we often have this steeped in view that mothers can’t be sensual or sexual beings. It’s a huge influence of that madonna whore complex. What do you have to say about that?
REGAN: I completely agree with that. That was something that I had not anticipated myself when becoming a mother and it has been quite prominent in my experience as well the experience I have had with alot of my clients - 99% of clients of my clients who are mothers. My background, I was a Yoga and Meditation teacher, professional dancer. My motto growing up was - if it feels good, do it. I was always connected with my body. I was an exercise physiologist. I know all about the body, what happens in pregnancy and birth and postpartum. One of the main things that really surprised me was this shift into Motherhood and this disconnect from sensuality. Also disconnect from sexuality and what I discovered from a lot of the practices that I was able to lean into before motherhood wasn’t fitting so well. It wasn’t as easily accessible in motherhood and therefore I didn’t have the access to what I thought I needed. My experience has definitely been once I stepped into motherhood, there was this whole new box of beliefs that I had unknowingly collected over a lifetime, a lot of my clients have collected over a lifetime. That are exactly along that kind of narrative of mothers cannot be sexual beings, or sensual beings, they cannot coexist. I definitely can connect with that. I had to find a way to feel good and sensuality was the gateway for me. The pathway for sexuality for me as a mother.
ELEANOR: Amazing. I think that is such an interesting point to make around your practices changing or needing to shift or not feeling as familiar as they once were after becoming a mother. How did your connection to your sensuality change tangibly afterwards?
REGAN: It was a big change in the sense, before children I had the time to commit to regular practices, commit to certain rituals so becoming a mother I wasn’t able to access that. For me, it was learning different ways to connect with my sensuality. Which meant learning more ways to connect with my body in a way that didn’t require more time, energy, didn’t require anything from a financial sense either. For me, it was a big exploration. Four months into motherhood, my eldest, he wasn’t sleeping well at all. A few months down the track, I was diagnosed with postnatal depression and anxiety and insomnia. Ultimately, I needed to find a way to make myself feel good. The journey back home to feeling good for me was really connecting to my body, connecting to my senses and ultimately making every practice of my day sensuality practice. Even the smallest thing, having your morning coffee, how often do we get to the bottom of the cup and we realise it’s gone - did we even taste it, smell it, feel the coffee cup in our hands? It was for me, accessing whatever I was doing at the time, accessing it with my body, with my senses, making it a sensual practice. It was really helpful in bringing me to the present moment, connecting and fostering the relationship with my body. Which ended up creating a pathway to a range of different things. Enhanced my sexuality, knowing around my boundaries, helped make decisions, helped me connect with that femine essence in myself that I honestly really hadn’t been connected to for a very long time. Embracing every moment that I could and making that a sensual practice.
ELEANOR: So beautiful. Everything I do as well is of the senses. Tuning it, stopping, slowing down and I feel like these practices are so simple that we can negate them as irrelevant or unnecessary that they wouldn’t work but in your experience it sounds like those little things are what helped you, it wasn’t this one big procedure or something that happened. It was those tiny moments that allowed you to come out of that phase.
REGAN: Yeah, you’re exactly right. I think if something is not hard or difficult we don’t think there is value to it. It’s like we need to suffer or work really hard for it to be of value or mean something. Those little moments are the things that have stacked, that have really allowed me to open that channel through to my ancient body wisdom to allow me to connect with my body and lifeforce energy within me. It hasn’t just been about nourishing and nurturing my sexual energy but nourishing, nurturing and cultivating more about that life force energy. I can have three kids and have broken sleep for five years and still feel so alive and find juiciness every day and be able to connect deeply with my children, husband and whoever I am around. Be able to come from a place of sovereignty within myself.
ELEANOR: So beautiful. It’s really inspiring to me. My audience knows that I am not a mother and I don’t have a desire to be a mother so it’s really wonderful for me to get people on the podcast who has this experience and because I know a lot of my audience are mothers, parents and a lot of them might be listening to this right now and thinking - that might be all well and good for you but they might have some resistance or judgement or hesitation. I can’t even finish a cup of coffee, I can’t even get out of my trackies, because I am doing this job of mothering. What would you say to someone who has that resistance - I don’t know how I can get there. What you’re experiencing, what you’re sharing sounds wonderful but what if they have that resistance and can’t quite get there yet?
REGAN: That’s such an awesome question in terms of practicality. It was something that I experienced as well. What I found wasn't the logistics around it. When I peeled back a few layers and started to journal on this and dive deeper into what was on the surface, a lot of it was what you talked about in the beginning was this idea that I as a mother need to come last, I wasn’t a priority, pleasure for a mother is frivolous, that it’s selfish, that a good mother needs to put her needs last. Actually, a lot of the belief stuff, the mindset work that we have picked up along the way. For me, it was about using some processes that I also use in my coaching practices of belief work - starting to work those beliefs are, where do they come from, not from the part of blaming other people but just to get some context around it. So often as mothers we actually picked up these things we believe to be true and held onto them, even if they are not serving us. When we look back we realise it's perhaps from a sideways comment from a stranger and perhaps we are almost orchestrating our days around these kinds of beliefs. I would suggest looking at, if there are any of those beliefs that are stopping you from accessing that pleasure. What is it that is stopping you, this is why I find, for me, I use pleasure as a tool, like a magnifying glass to find those beliefs. What would feel good for you, what would you want to do, what would be pleasurable? It doesn’t have to be in a sexual way. It could be in a matter of having lunch with your girlfriends without any children attached to you. When that pleasure desire arrives, what are those thoughts that are shutting it down? Is it the belief that a mother needs to be with your child all the time? I need to only enjoy pleasure once I have been productive and ticked all the boxes? Following the desires and being open and curious as to why you are not allowing yourself to have them in the first place. Then, exploring that, not judging that, seeing if there is a thought, a belief that would feel a whole lot better something you could replace that with. For me, I had decided that instead of a good mother who puts herself last or is with her children 24/7 I started to really look at the benefits that my children would get from being with other people or benefits of having a mum who is experiencing her own pleasures. Letting go of this idea of guilty pleasures, there is no such thing. A lot of that mindset work is really great to explore. You could do that in a journal. In terms of logistics, ultimately, when I am reminding myself, make it a regular practice. You are not going to be perfect, you are probably not going to do it 100% of the time. Literally, if you are having a sip of your coffee, or your tea, you can connect with some of your senses. You can feel your feet in the earth. It’s also thinking about the things that bring you pleasure that you can do with your children. So often, we think that we are with the kids all the time, but can you take them somewhere out in nature where it feels beautiful, can you feel the sunshine on your skin, the breeze in your face, can you go somewhere that is nourishing for you that will bring you cup-filling pleasure experiences. Does that make sense?
ELEANOR: That’s so beautiful. I think that is wonderful advice in general whether or not they are a parent or not. From what I have observed from many friends becoming parents in my life recently, it seems like there is this overwhelming guilt, this parental guilt, in particularly mother’s guilt of that intrusive thought that I am not good enough, I am a bad mum if…, I’m a bad parent if I do X, Y & Z. I have had friends calling and saying I feel really guilty if they cannot produce enough breast milk or if their child isn’t sleeping well through the night and whether they are doing something wrong. I love that notion of self enquiry - where do those stories come from? Whose voice is in your head saying - you’re a bad mum, you’re a bad parent because of this and I think a lot of them come from random people, mother’s groups, people on facebook, that make you take on a little too much and it can really impact you.
REGAN: I have really enjoyed witnessing myself in terms of pregnancy, birth, motherhood, seeing it as this evolution of myself. It seems like the more babies I have had the more I come home to myself and what is right for me and what aligns with me, it has been an epic journey.
ELEANOR: I think that is a beautiful way of looking at it as well, So many people assume when you become a parent you lose a part of yourself but for what you are saying - you become more of yourself in a way.
REGAN: Yeah, I think that was a lot of the problem that I had in the first year of parenthood. Not that I was struggling but on top of that I layered this second layer of suffering around I shouldn’t be feeling like this, I am not doing it right, I lost myself, and I am unrecognisable. It is almost like once I let go of those judgements I allowed myself to feel everything that came up, allowed myself to try and connect with my body through movement or through the senses or listening to what it needed and wanted. I found it was easier to actually find that piece of myself that had been there all along. It was quite an evolution. I also think when you have kids - I have three under five - when you are busy with kids you can end up feeling like you have less time and energy for the shit that doesn’t matter. You’re not willing to spend time with people that don't light you up, you’re not willing to spend time that feels like an obligation, not willing to sacrifice that disconnection with your children for something that isn’t going to nourish you. You are able to decide what works for you, what you are willing to put your energy into, what you are willing to sacrifice and that’s not to say that you have to sacrifice a lot, that’s a whole different conversation.
ELEANOR: It sounds to me, it allows you that perspective to say what is important, that’s not worth giving my attention to. You gain more clarity than what you had before.
REGAN: Yes, exactly. That’s more articulate. I noticed after my second was born I started to dive deeper into my work and I had decided because I had these beautiful little humans that ultimately I wasn’t prepared to do anything that didn’t feel good for me, that was obligation, I wasn’t prepared to say yes to everything that I thought I should. Particularly in business, I wasn’t prepared to do the “hustle”. I decided that it was only going to get done in a way that really felt good for me, I would allow my desires to drive me when it came to what I had to offer, when it came down to who I wanted to work with, the ways I offered my coaching practices. It’s almost like you get a new perspective on where you would like to spend your time and energy. From that I have been able to really evolve my business and relationships in a really aligned, eased and flowing way just by following that pleasure.
ELEANOR: I think that is so beautiful. I know that in my experience working with freelancers and seeing friends of mine who have recently become mothers. I just feel that mum’s get shit done so well, there's no procrastination - there’s this window, I'm getting it done, then I have to move on. It’s really impressive. It is so beautiful to have that awareness - I'm clear on this, I want to follow my pleasure, then continue on raising these children.
REGAN: Yeah. Being able to blend my work and my children, my motherhood, my womanhood, and being in an intimate relationship, allowing it all to be my work, to be part of me, all of it to be part of my motherhood journey, not trying to separate them all and trying to keep them separate, into their little categories. Sometimes it's more about flowing with the motherhood journey, sometimes it’s more about the business journey. I’ve been pleasantly surprised after having this third baby, I wasn’t sure how it would go in terms of available time I would have to work with my clients. I have been really committed to the belief that I am always going to be well supported to do my work however that is going to arrive and shit has been getting done. Windows of time have been opening up, energy has come forth with the things that I am desiring to create. It’s like it is creating energy for me. Childcare seems to come out of nowhere, in terms of my mum or my husband coming home early one day. It has really been incredible to see that evolve. By me being open to what feels good for me and following that has created this open expansiveness where I am open for any kind of opportunities who provide themselves to me. It’s been a really interesting thing to experience and see.
ELEANOR: I love that. A lot of people will mull over that and it is a wonderful thing to feel and learn how you can integrate that energy as well. There’s one thing that I wanted to ask you, you mentioned before about really trying to tap into ways that following your pleasure, allowing yourself to be sensual, exploring that side of yourself. How following your pleasure will impact positively benefit your children. I think that this is a wonderful takeaway. If you have a certain amount of benefits that you think everybody needs to know I think that will be so helpful for our listeners especially for those that are parents.
REGAN: I love that question. Thank you for asking such a great question. First of all, we start thinking - what will the benefits be to me? I want to start with the actual benefits to what we are modelling to our children. Our children are the next generation. I think that if we had gripes with the way that women are treated, others are expected to be in the world if we don’t believe in the belief that we should come last and the idea that we have to be productive to experience pleasure then that all starts with us. With us as mothers, we have the opportunity to create a whole new paradigm, where the next generation doesn’t have to unlearn all that stuff that isn’t going to serve them. When I can be dancing in the kitchen, I can let my children see that I can be playing with them at this moment, because I can lay in the sunshine because that feels good for me. I am modelling to them, first of all what self-care looks like, what loving yourself looks like, what connecting with your body looks like, what setting boundaries looks like, there's a whole lot of things that we get to model to our children. Eg: for the next generation to see what it looks like to access and prioritise our pleasure. The whole realm of what we can model to them is so powerful. In terms of the benefits for me or my clients, or listeners who are mothers, or parents. When we do things that fill our cup it allows us to nourish ourselves, it enables us to reduce our stress levels, find this overwhelm so easily, we get to increase our reactive threshold, the space when our kids do something that makes us want to scream, and the actual reaction we have. I’ll be very well aware that I haven’t been focusing on doing what feels good for me when I start getting a bit snappy with my kids and I'm telling them no straight away instead of asking them why they wanted to do that? Inquiring a bit deeper. Obviously having that deeper connection with your children, it’s easier to relate with other people, easier to have compassion, and to show empathy, those few things create a huge shift in our world. That’s what is fueling me.
ELEANOR: I love that. The reason why I wanted to include that question, is because I know there are so many parents who have programmed that self-sacrifice. Your kids come first, I have to put them first. If we can flip that a little bit and say yes, by putting yourself first and by prioritising your pleasure here are all the range of benefits for your children. I feel that it sells it a little bit more. It's so interesting that sometimes we fail to go - oh yeah, that’s going to be good for me but as parents, from what I understand, they say - it’s going to be good for my kids, now I understand or know it feels more aligned. I don’t know if that’s me just making shit up but they are my observations.
REGAN: You are definitely on to something there. Being in the same proximity to your children almost takes a higher value than the actual connection with your children. I think that our generation of parents are starting to understand, explore, witness is perhaps it is more important to have that deeper connection with our children even if it is being with them half the time then being with them for twice as long and not being able to connect with them, not having that relationship, that is formed from a place of wellbeing. When we are in this state of stress or overwhelm or tension when our nervous system is strung out it's really difficult to be in the present moment, to be able to form those deep connections. I see that it has so much value.
ELEANOR: Definitely. I absolutely agree, because my work is entirely about presence, for people like us who teach about sensuality, to be sensual is to be of the senses. You can only be of the senses only if you are truly present. The way that sensual practices funnel out into everyday life is that you have the capacity to be deeply present. That means that all your relationships (friendships, romantic, family, and your children) if you’re present everybody is going to be so much more nourished. You can be in the same room as someone for four hours and feel so bloody lonely as opposed to 10 mins of them being really present, holding eye contact, having a wonderful conversation with them and it can feel so much more nourishing them simply being around somebody. As a parent, I think that’s so widely important. I know, as a child, with my parents I know that it felt more nourishing to receive.
REGAN: You’re right, when you are talking about sensuality being of the senses. When we can actually embrace that as a practice not to enable us to feel good but to feel present, it then enables us to feel in our body so that when our children are triggering us, when we are starting to get frustrated, when we are starting to get annoyed, angry or triggered by our children we can hear those messages from our body - our body is saying - wooh, this is getting too much - your connection with your body can sense your boundaries are getting crossed here, you are starting to get worked up. It allows you that kind of time to have a buffer, allows you to slow up a little bit. Perhaps when you get frustrated as opposed to the point of rage or being able to talk things through with your kids as opposed to getting angry and yelling. I have never felt that kind of anger since becoming a mother, this is a real common thread that seems really taboo, that not many people want to talk about and our children are the whole beings that reflect a whole bunch of stuff to us that push our trigger buttons and they are designed that way so we can obviously love that within them so we can hopefully love that in us in return. For me, being able to maintain and improve that deeper connection with my body and my clients as well as been one of the major things that I didn’t expect that will happen from being more sensual, they didn’t expect they would be more patient and more content and more be able to take deep breaths and express themselves in a healthy way as opposed to really reacting. That’s been a huge paradigm shift as well.
ELEANOR: I love that. To shift things to a different gear, because I know I have a lot of listeners who will really want to know the answer to this topic - post birth, post having children, sex - everything changes. I know a lot of my clients who are parents have said, that they have lost a lot of their sex drive or they just don’t feel comfortable in their bodies, alot of things come up for them around sexuality not to mention about that feeling about not being allowed to be both a parent and a sexual being at the same time. What are your tips and thoughts post pregnancy/post birth/post having children?
REGAN: I'm so glad we have gone here. Ultimately it’s going to be so unique and I see this as an opportunity for us to redefine what it means to be intimate. For us, to redefine what we desire, for us to deepen the connection with our partners. Coming from a place without any judgement and with an openness to be able to feel the stuff that comes up for us and not judge it and explore it. So often it becomes this transition where it becomes this opportunity for women to actually think about how do I want to feel pleasure, how do I want to be touched, how I want to experience intimacy? Like we talked about before, these voices from outside of us of what is supposed to happen, what they should be when it comes to intimacy, when it comes to sexuality, when it comes to being sexual, having sexual energy. My brief dip into this conversation is to know that it’s going to be unique for everyone, know that there are going to be different things that come up for you, depending if there was birth trauma, whole range of stuff that comes up through pregnancy, through postpartum, Having those conversations with your partners around all those things that you would like and I see this as such a great opportunity because sometimes when we can only go surface levels with our partner of how we would like to be. They can only meet us with the depth that we have gone. 1) going with your own rhythm
2) choosing to explore what would feel good for you now,
3) inviting open conversation and
4) getting creative. There will be times when logistically it can be really difficult to find time to have sex, especially when you are co-sleeping with children. I would invite an element of creativity and an opportunity to redefine sexual energy, sexual experiences. With this conversation around libido as well it can be definitely be something that really dips as well for women particularly because when we step into first time mum’s stepping into this new paradigm of motherhood, there’s not a huge amount of support, we are not living in our communities where we have access to a lot of support. Most women and most mothers are experiencing postnatal depletion, I have studied about tantric arts and we have looked at those three different energies and the first one we really want to cultivate that principal energy that I call your first cup, that basic needs cup, when we can enable that cup to be filled then it can start to overflow into that sexual energy cup. We are already feeling depleted because we are breastfeeding, around the clock, we are having to do the cooking and cleaning and all the mental load stuff and we don’t have a lot of support around us and we are not feeling nurtured and nourished and not prioritising our our own needs. It can really be hard then for that next cup to start to be filled. That’s when we can start to feel really low, when we don’t have desires for anything. We might not have a desire for creating a meal, an outfit, what to do with our day. Everyday can become stagnant. It is something that we really dived into when I worked with other women when it came to libido. How can we get our needs met? Another great tool to practice for connecting with your body. Going to the toilet when necessary, eating when you’re hungry, taking yourself to bed when you’re tired obviously doing these things when you can so that you are filling that cup because when you are depleted in those basic needs there's not going to be that left over energy for churning up that sexual life force energy then flows into desire - desire for sex, desire for the creation of anything. That’s what sex is designed for, creation of a new human. When we can really channel and cultivate more of that feminie energy, sexual life force energy that’s where our aliveness comes from. That inspiration, that desire to create. It could be creating anything. Having a look at what is and isn’t working in our world, if our needs are being met. How can we get other people to help get us to meet them? How can we meet them on our own, what can we put into place to try and prevent that depletion? Not being hard on yourself when we don’t find that energy in that sexual desire zone, desire for creation.
ELEANOR: Absolutely, I love that. I think that there is a huge amount of pressure that a lot of people place on new parents to get back to their pre-children self immediately and in so many ways, your body, your relationships, your sexuality and sexuality is a really important and wonderful thing. Like you said, take your time to fill up your basic needs cup first then allow that conversation. I love what you said about having that conversation and exploring and what might feel good and pleasurable now as opposed to having to go back and how you used to have sex before, especially if you have had birth trauma. Getting used to a different body that is wonderful but different, it’s going to be a bit of a journey.
REGAN: Exactly.
ELEANOR: I wanted to finish up by asking you to share your top 3 ways to connect directly with your sensuality as a new mum.
REGAN: I'm going to make these really simple and practical so you can weave them into your day because that is what we need.
Connecting with your senses - that can shift you from being in this very masculine heavy rational, get shit done, goal orientated type of energy into your body, into that feminie expressive, slow flowing energy. Ultimately, connecting with your senses. This could be the difference between getting your kids from A - B in the car, feeling really stressed out, like you are rushed, being really tense and annoyed and looking for the fastest route to get there and as compared to getting into the car and feeling the support that you are receiving from the seat, feeling the steering wheel in your hands. Smelling your tea or coffee, feeling that sunshine in your face, noticing the beauty that is around you on the way. You are still going to get there in the same amount of time but it’s going to feel a whole lot better.
Music - allow music and movement. Sensual sandwich - when you are packing your children’s lunch boxes and doing any mum gig stuff that you need to do. How can you make it more sensual? Alot of my instagram community follow along with sensual sandwiches on a Thursday or Friday morning. Playing a song that feels good, moving your hips , making it a little ridiculous, getting into your body, accessing that movement and music. Bringing pleasure and sensuality back into your body.
ELEANOR: I love that because it is so easy to put on music and dance when you are doing the things you need to do and what a wonderful model for your children to see your mum just dancing around in the kitchen while she is making your lunch. That’s cool, that’s fun, such a lovely image for a child to see.
REGAN: Such a mood booster as well.
Have some time to date yourself. Maybe it’s a bath, time in your own bedroom, time at the beach. Have time to connect with your body. Put some nice oils on your body, adorning yourself with something that feels good. Choosing something to wear that makes you feel good. Ultimately, allow yourself to date yourself. Put on a feel good playlist, make yourself something delicious that you can savour and taste and enjoy. Opening a glass of champagne, loving on yourself in a very intimate way that doesn’t have to be about sex, it can be about feeling your soft skin and being able to appreciate yourself whether thats physically or just the person that you are. When you can, finding pockets to date yourself whatever that may look like.
ELEANOR: Beautiful. I think that is wonderful advice for everybody, especially the parents out there. Thank you so much for your wisdom and for sharing so many wonderful things with us today. Regan I would love for you to share how people can find you on Instagram, and other socials. Where can we find you?
REGAN: Instagram @regan_figg and also I have a podcast Dive in with Regan Figg. If you are interested in hearing more, I have my ecstatic birth story from my last birth which I believe was quite ecstatic from my sensuality practices and actually my sensuality practices with my business to be honest, that is what I was focused on a lot through my pregnancy, that came through such an ecstatic, amazing beautiful birth. I share some of the keys to that. So Dive in with Regan Figg or Instagram @regan_figg I would love to connect with your listeners there.
ELEANOR: Fabulous. Thank you so much. I think maybe another time we will have to get you to talk about your ecstatic birth story. We don’t have enough time today but I know a lot of people will be keen to learn more. Definitely go and check our Regan, I will have all the details in the Show notes as well. Thank you again for coming.
REGAN: Thank you so much. I was deeply honoured to be here, spending this time with you. I only do things that bring me pleasure and here we are. Thank you for having me.
